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Sacrificing Intimacy
Sacrificing Intimacy I have been in the lifestyle 3 years. I have been a BBC Slut for nearly my entire life. was difficult for live a normal life when you have struggle just make tomorrow. I found ways to overcome every obstacle thrown my way. Temporary situations felt more stable than anything being permanent. This made it very easy to let go of any thing/one to prevent it/them from becoming permanent. Sex was my tool, i used it as a form of introduction to form relationships with others, while at the using for an excuse keep the relation at a temporary level. was also used cause an end any relations that gave me discomfort. I used sex manipulate relationships with hundreds of people, I never noticed the destruction it was actually doing me. I had turned sex into an object, that was shaped as a wall that wall blocked me from forming any kind of personal/emotional relationship with my sex partner. In my eyes, sex was never personal so it held no value to me, on an emotional level. The saddest part of it all is the fact that I had simply done what I did best, I had found a way to tackle a barrier that had been blocking my path. And I survived it, no matter the sacrifice I caused myself to suffer. All the while I was victim to more than a few sacrifices in relation to sex, for me it had always been the hundreds of men/strangers I slept with, making the choice I made hundreds of time to have sex with men excusable, end up victimizing myself even more. Everything changed 3 years ago, which is why I refer myself as new this lifestyle that I've been in for decades. I met a man was like no other, i felt things for this man, I had never felt at all. I've had sex several thousands of times with hundreds of men that I cant remember. For 3 years, i have not been able stop thinking about every time I have had sex with this man and how much he means to me. So I explained this unexplainable feeling i have for this man to a friend. She seemed to understand exactly how i felt, then she said," That sounds like intimacy, its normal to feel those feelings with someone you intimate with, but its weird that your trying to explain it as if it were the first time you had been intimate with someone" "...That's when the true sacrifice revealed itself: "What the hell do you mean SEX is INTIMATE?, Your telling me I should feel this unexplainable, loving connection when I have SEX?" WOW, i experienced intimacy for the 1st time at the age of 42....?? SO MUCH SEX SO MANY MEN SO MANY TIMES SO Little REMEMBERED Then realizing I didn't even like it!!! SO WHY DID I? WHY SO MUCH? WHEN IT DIDNT EVEN FEEL GOOD?. The fact is, I never would have had all that worthless sex if had knew it's value. |
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12/2/2021 2:39 pm |
You can not please everyone so you might as well please yourself! Please become an Apollo602021 blog follower!
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Intimacy is complex and happens on many levels and in many ways. Physical, emotional, spiritual, and even intellectual intimacy can create a powerful bond. The blend of these forms will vary by person and relationship. I hope you find the best blend for you. “Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.” ― Oscar Wilde
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I hope you and your friend can build on this intimacy and you both enjoy it for a very long time. Question were you there providing pleasure for others more so than having them pleasing you? It should be pleasure for both of you
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I have been back and forth in your situation. For me, and this is just my opinion, I have been in love and lust. Falling in love is great, but when you fall out of love that hurts. I have been in love and than been in lust. I swing these days, and I love it. The lust works for me these days. I guess it is because I swing with nice people. I will hold on to this lifestyle for now, but you never know, it's like that song states "Fooled Around and Fell in Love. Great post by you! Thanks for sharing!!
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1 post 6/8/2021 4:34 am |
Sex just to be a big thing in my life until I find something I’m very passionate about meet my family that been under or at front for me the idea of being part of it is taking my soul away I spent a lot money I don’t have I insulated my self to focus and learn I play stupid date games just with the illusion that is my family trying to get my attention with something they thought I like the most but at the I got nothing not family time no learn not nothing just humiliated me and playing games for 3 day what I been doing Stan still move slow and listen to all the games and dates sites and everything come from my family but is not love is not dirección is just fake weak test that I already know but I play the game to
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[backpocket13]..
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1. Healing Is A Process – don’t rush it— “And so I wait. I wait for time to heal the pain and raise me to me feet once again – so that I can start a new path, my own path, the one that will make me whole again.” ― Jan Canfield. Grief doesn’t magically end after a set period of time. It will always remind you in your life where your feelings of loss and pain will return. Time doesn’t heal pain, it makes it easier to handle the pain. 2. Failure is good— “Failure should be our teacher, not our undertaker. Failure is delay, not defeat. It is a temporary detour, not a dead end. Failure is something we can avoid only by saying nothing, doing nothing, and being nothing.” —Denis Waitley. We try so hard to avoid failure, but failure is the real evidence that we've tried. If you avoid failure, you avoid taking action. Expect and accept that failure is part of the experience. Learn from it and move on. We need to fail in order to achieve better. 3.Don’t Let Your Past Rule Your Life Now And In The Future. “You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the future” —Jan Glidewell. You can’t ignore or forget your past, it has moulded you into who you are now. Your past is your opportunity to learn the lessons you need in order to deal with your present life. Let go of your regrets in life, make peace with your past, accept it and move on. You are not what happened in your past, you are whom you choose to be now and in your future. Become the strong empowered resilient person you desire to be. The person who looks forward the future and is living a happy fulfilled life. {image}
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The saying " better late than never "certainly applies. I know for me it was the opposite. Sex was always an intimate act for me. It wasn't until I was older that I could appreciate sex as just sex. Now I'm back to my old feelings for a variety of reasons. I think its great that you discovered another plateau for sex. Fucking is fun but making love is like touching the stars. Just my opinion of course My name is MrWrong and I approved this comment
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4/16/2021 4:27 pm |
Sad story with hopefully a better ending..
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Hey Darlin, ........You know what they say,.......Hindsight is 20/20,........... Sinfully Yours, backpocket13
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Wow that is stunning, ypure a gem.
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How wonderful, you let go SEX and entered the world of LOVE MAKING Oh yes, SEX is not intimacy, it is an empty physical act, love making is fullfeeling, lasts much longer than the physical act. When you love a man and he loves you in return Making Babies turns into a much larger dimension, it turns into heaven Don’t ever return to SEX, stay in heaven ___________________________________________-_____________ __________ _________ All I wish for are men I can fall in love with and who like Making Babies and not just want Sex! After all, when it comes to Virgin, Experienced or Very Tight I have 2 out of 3 to offer I love pussies and adore nice dicks
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4/16/2021 2:44 pm |
Good for you
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4/16/2021 2:09 pm |
Life is life anyway.
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