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This blog contains content not approved for consumption by children, senators, religious leaders and/or other easily damaged psyches, those seeking to enhance or establish political careers and/or possessed of delusions of grandeur. If accidentally exposed, flush eyes with cold water and induce vomiting. If irritation persists, sit quietly and watch PBS. Not for internal use. This blog and its related post's are GUARANTEED not to make you go blind, masturbate (and THEN go blind), become a social liability, induce you to act out atrocities that you would otherwise never indulge in, or burn eternally in hell. Mccartney2003 accepts NO responsibility for any and all random acts of stupidity or violence committed by losers who may blame popular blogs and/or sugary snack foods for causing their inherent basic lack of control. You're on your own. Thank you and good night.
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The blogs of the month. A Mccartney2003 Aug Award.
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 10:14 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2567 Views
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These are the blogs that I have been looking over for the past 30 days. Please do check them out and support their effort in the blogs here at Black Flirting.
Masseur_0
Masseur_0
Masseur_0
Great wisecracks and insight into a teacher gone mad.....
txrose4uNTX
txrose4uNTX
[blog txrose4uNTX]
Wonderful woman with soul in Texas. She has insight and passion all rolled up in a woman most men would beg to have.
Elysia2005
Elysia2005
[blog Elysia2005]
Great woman in Houston. Fun post's to read.
Smart and witty. A great friend and a friend to all.
nightstogether
nightstogether
nightstogether
I like how this guy thinks. Smart and loves travel. A teacher as well but not gone quite as mad.
talldarkavg1
talldarkavg1
[blog talldarkavg1]
Comedy at it's best. The imagination is wonwerful and the images he paints for you in his words are a welcome trip outside reality.
keithcancook
keithcancook
Though not too active. His post's are well worth the read. Funny and witty he brings forth into the blogs here at Black Flirting a welcome laspe of reality and insight into a deranged but wonderful mind.
mzhunyhole
mzhunyhole
[blog mzhunyhole]
I love to read the work of this woman. She has a open mind and dives into many wonderful topics.
SensuallyKatey
SensuallyKatey
[blog SensuallyKatey]
Great insight and wonderful topics. Always wonderful to see her mind working in her blog and her ideas on life.
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Smoking
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 9:52 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2300 Views
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Any hint's on quiting? Smoked from age 12. I am 27 now. Seeing Peter Jennings die from lung cancer and seeing my dad fade away help to hone it in on me. I need to quit. Thae patches give me the flu and worse, the gum makes me throw up and cold turkey never works, trust me I know.
I've tried. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
I hate this.
Help?
Anyone?
My Angelina is helping me but I am now finding myself in a new job that keeps on driving me to smoke more and more. It's how I relax. Always has been. Never did it to be cool or hip or whatever. And yes I had a stressful childhood.
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The Adversary........
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 9:30 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2206 Views
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I'm more convinced than ever that the cat is out to get me. He's watching me type now, so in order to allay suspicion I refer to him only as "The Adversary." I have written several excruciatingly documented letters to the local newspapers to inform them of The Adversary's plans for me but for some reason I haven't heard back. It's possible that he is intercepting my mail. My friends remain utterly in The Adversary's thrall, as ever, and the is far too stupid to be of any help. I grow tired of eating cat food, but I fear he has compromised everything else with his mind control drugs. So I watch, and I wait.
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Bejesus in the box.
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 9:20 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2109 Views
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I once went to Jack in the Bejesus* and was delighted to note the presence of a huge, crispy, deep-fried housefly in my carton of french fries. I went back and told the gentleman manning the counter about my find, and his reply was to offer me more fries. I passed.
Now that's the kind of experience I'd expect at the Bejesus
* - So called because of the hidden ChristFish in the logo:
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Fat cat. ya know ya like it PHAT
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 9:17 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2364 Views
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My cat and I had a fight this morning. A little misunderstanding, if you will. It ends up that he's sensitive about his body image, and gets upset when I make fun of him for being fat, while I'm sensitive about being eviscerated by half-crazed animals.
He's looking at me right now, you know. I'll bet he's thinking about how he wants to slash at me with his claws, and to take me in his jaws and fling me around the room like the synthetic mice I buy him in futile attempts to quell his rage, and then finally, when he's done toying with me, how he wants to tear me asunder and feast on my entrails.
I'll bet he's TOTALLY thinking that.
Or, at very least, he's thinking about walking on my keyboard for the 11th time since I started typing this.
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Most popular blogs? Nah just sexual discrimination
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 9:12 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2261 Views
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I don't mean to stand and throw stones or anything but something has bugged me from the first time I joind the world of blogs here on Black Flirting.
When you go to the main blog screen you see the most popular male blogs, most popular couple blogs and something seems to be missing.
AHHH!
For some reason there is not a most popular female blog section. To me this just seems wrong. I know Black Flirting seems to be too busy to keep a correct count on the most popular blogs in the state that you live in, that's nothing big.
But hell, Why is there not a section made for the lovley ladies here at Black Flirting so their work in their blogs can be shown. There are alot of great blogs here by the women of this site.
I think it's a shame for them to be left out in the dark. They need to be shown in the light to bring their work more notice and to get the they deserve. Now most of you are thinking oh this is some guy thats out trying to make it with the ladies or something. Wrong.
I have one thank you. I just thought that because no one was making a statement about this that someone should. Like they say sexual discrimination never go's away if you remain silent.
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Revenge of the nerds in stereo
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 8:34 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2287 Views
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Well today way my frist day at the tech support job. At first I thought I took a wrong turn and ended up on the set of revenge of the nerds.
I met some cool folks who were nice and funny as well. I overlooked the pocket protectors and the 12 choices of pens in each one...
Overlooked eyeglasses with tape in the center and all the talk about motherboards.
Otherwise it was a ok day. I also got to meet a crazy psycho ex seal who talked about blowing up things in the old days and people who hung on my every word in amazment when I told them of my adventures in logistics. They thought it was so amazing that someone like me was there. I kept my laughter inside as they kept asking questions like my at bedtime. They had a glow in their eyes and you could tell that for half a day at least they loved hearing about things other than internet speeds and the new OS.
Poor bastards. Logistics is almost as boring.
Almost. We do have the off and on human remains and people trying to smuggle stuff but otherwise we just help prevet terrorism and loons.
I still am laughing when I think of me being surrounded by a herd of computer geeks who made a big deal about where I had worked before.
And now for me to be a geek.
It was like C3P0 in Return of the Jedi when the Ewoks first saw him and started to worship him.
Ohhhhahh Ohhhahh
lol.
Who knows maybe I shall amass a huge army of brainy geeks to help me take over the world!
Come on Pinky we have work to do!
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Curses to the phone company.
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 8:06 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2763 Views
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Well tonight sucks because I wanted to see Ms. Angelina. The phone is out from what I understand. I tried to call her today from work with no luck and it's out again all night from what her mother said. I hate the phone company.
At least her's.
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
So to her phone company I send the following heart warming thoughts and feelings.
May 16 flaming telemarketers choke on dead crabs while laying on your hot tub."
May two of my favorite door-to-door salesmen suck refried beans beside your expensive wazoo."
May an English quart of tanked Fidel Castros castrate sporks at a fund-raising event for your refurbished love slave."
May you have nightmares in which beast-like holler 'Them's fight'n words!' to hockey pucks after hearing a loud *pop* coming from your blue and red tights."
May 256 constipated sumo wrestlers discover the secret of poopie poopie poop poopity poop poop poopie poop poop poop after abducting your maximum dosage of secret lover, Roseanne Barr.
May 256 homeless ball-lickers swing a Nerf Crotch-Bat at whale blubber after consuming your delicate chicken ranch.
May three bazillion paper thin Hooters girls play in a band called monkey porn and the mayonnaise while worshiping your secret mother.
May a shitload of moist orcs whip Count Chocula while worshiping your least favorite ass.
May 32 glorious nazis be poisoned by duct tape while getting it on with your doctor's legs.
May a handful of nacho cheese covered managers dillute Cajun Cheetos after being forced to smell your crusty WrestleMania t-shirt.
May 32 furious door to door salesmen chew up deodorant sticks over your cat's tongue.
May a baker's dozen of re-animated heart surgeons smuggle your rug burnt Planter's Cheeseballs after having a "bad experience" with your nose hair.
May 32 fluid ounces of outrageously huge boy bands get the nickname "recovering alcoholic" because they enjoy the classic story "Green Eggs and evil ducks" while they get a lewd tattoo of wet cement using only your recommended daily allowance of dinner salad.
May an imaginary number of single orcs explode Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by your 250 year old excrement.
May 15,000 bewildered woodchucks feel pennies after pledging allegiance to your crusty Tater Twister.
May 50 billion nearsighted ninjas play spin the bottle with lime jello (aka "drunk sausages") while performing a full cavity search on your wart covered snarglies.
May an english quart of strange porn stars buy 100 shares of stock in virgins while thinking lustfully of your gigantic sweat socks.
May an unknown amount of French CRNet Owners "Keep It Real" with leeches after being forced to smell your supple sweat socks.
May 999 wild librarians worship cancerous growths after waxing your condom.
May three trillion sad construction workers melt down the Statue of Liberty after having a "bad experience" with your gnarly gazebo.
May three trillion schizophrenic toll booth operators claim to have once slept with smoked string cheese sticks beside your platypus.
May 25,000,000 nacho cheese covered librarians pick hairs out of Monica Lewinsky while hiding out in your supple fonics monkey.
May a megabyte of sex-crazed Ricky Martin impersonators spend eternity with easter eggs underneath your unusually small toilet.
May 911 tanked Ricky Martin impersonators declare bankruptcy after investing in 2 tons of 1.21 JIGAWATTS!!!! next to your dinner salad.
May an english quart of flaccid fighter pilots discuss that "not so fresh feeling" with the Taco Bell while tinkering with your unusually small secret lover, Roseanne Barr.
May a megabyte of uninhibited people named "dr. fresh" set fire to yogurt while standing on your mom's thingy.
May 42 rabid dwarves glaze a ham with sharp chedder cheese while licking your worthless yoga master.
May an english quart of crack smoking Bob Barkers flog 2 percent milk above your under-appreciated skid-marked undies.
May a barrel of diabetic Fidel Castros shove pitchforks into watermelons below your pile of dirty underwear.
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2
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The lottery this week. Dreams..........
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Posted:Aug 8, 2005 6:22 pm
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2096 Views
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Features of the mansion I will build after I win this week's lottery....
In-ground margarita machine
Malevolent computerized intelligence to open and close garage door
World's largest singing bass
Catacombs
Servant monkeys with jet-packs
Replica of Michelangelo's David made of pure bacon grease
Cable with every channel possible on a movie screen sized plasma TV.
A indoor race track.
A pit that I can fill with chcoclate pudding for women to wrestle in.
Recliners that can haul as* with a power motor in them and have races around the house with.
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0
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Houston we have a problem...
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Posted:Aug 7, 2005 1:25 am
Last Updated:Aug 23, 2007 8:35 pm
2707 Views
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Where in the hell is keithcancook
keithcancook
His blog has been somewhat inactive.
I love his stuff and would love to see hime around more often. Had anyone seen hide or hair of him?
Hope the guy is ok.
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5
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It's been announced....Indy 4
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Posted:Aug 7, 2005 1:07 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2362 Views
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It's going to be out next year. Indiana Jones 4.
Set in the 1950's. What are your feelings on this movie by Speilburg and Lucas. Thank God Lucas is done with Star Wars and can focus on some real movies. What do you think the plot line will be? What do you think of the first Indy movie without Nazi's?
lol.
Please do tell.
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1
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Fun reading!
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Posted:Aug 7, 2005 1:00 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2142 Views
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Enjoy my pretend reading list.
Mary Kate and Ashley in The Case of the Missing Pain Pills
Heather Has Two Holes
Black Tar Heroin for the Soul
Are You There God? It's Me, a Poorly Written One-Dimensional Character Who is Attempting to Thwart an Implausible Conspiracy, Margaret (a Dan Brown/Judy Blume collaboration)
The Morally Ambiguous Faerie Tales of the Brothers Quim
Jonathan Livingston Tapeworm
Harry Potter and the Petrodollar-Spewing Kidlit Franchise
Tuesdays with Chaka
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0
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I've Got a Feeling
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Posted:Aug 7, 2005 12:50 am
Last Updated:Mar 5, 2006 9:27 pm
2125 Views
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And yes I've got a feeling...
Something I never thought possible again.
I've Got a Feeling
By John Lennon and Paul Mccartney
I’ve got a feeling, a feeling deep inside
Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
I’ve got a feeling, a feeling I can’t hide
Oh no, Oh no, Oh no,
Yeah I’ve got a feeling.
Oh please believe me
I’d hate to miss the train
Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
And if you leave me I won’t be late again
Oh no, Oh no, Oh no.
Yeah I’ve got a feeling yeah.
All these years I’ve been wandering around,
Wondering how come nobody told me
All that I was looking for was somebody
Who looked like you.
Ev’rybody had a hard year
Ev’rybody had a good time
Ev’rybody had a wet dream,
Ev’rybody saw the sunshine
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
Ev’rybody had a good year,
Ev’rybody let their hair down,
Ev’rybody pulled their socks up,
Ev’rybody put their foot down.
Oh yeah, Oh yeah, Oh yeah.
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To link to this blog (Mccartney2003) use [blog Mccartney2003] in your messages.
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